I’m not even sure where I saw this quote but I wrote it on a sticky note and stuck it to my computer monitor at work and it reads “If the mountain was smooth, you couldn’t climb it” I have been looking at that little quote every day for months. I nod my head each time I really look at it.
I have a real easy time pushing myself down and especially the moment I may even start to feel stronger. I’m very mean to myself. I have shared this before. Harder on myself than I would ever imagine being on ANYONE ELSE.
Recently I was having a conversation with my mom. Telling her that I’m my own worst enemy. You see we had gone to a ladies night out together where we heard a dynamic speaker. My mom had asked what spoke to me most. I immediately said that I really loved that part about Psalm 18:29 “For by You I can run against a troop, by my God I can leap over a wall.” That really spoke to me. The image of me looking up, way up high to this wall that was so gigantic I could barely consider getting over to the other side, yet this scripture made it perfectly clear that I can. I can with Him. He can get me over that wall. It was a powerful feeling to know that if I trust in Him, he can lift me up over the tallest walls.
My mom is such a good mama. She is so wise and she listens to our every word. Mostly when I talk to her each day I’m very grateful that she listens to my ranting, my crazy ideas, my stories. She has always been such a great listener and encourager. She was very quick to remind me of some really big break throughs that have happened this year. She reminded me of things that have changed for the better, times I have stepped up and been brave, some healing has even happened. She brought to light the things I had so quickly taken for granted and tossed back to the darkness. I’m thankful for this special relationship we share. I was also recently reminded sadly that we are not guaranteed tomorrow, and as my mom says, “Not even the next minute”
Knowing this I really do want to try much harder to focus on what’s important. Stop my complaining. I have nothing to complain about. Did you know recently I complained about the sun in my face as I drove our girl to school. Yes, I was complaining about that bright light shining down on the palm trees with the blue sky as its backdrop. I thankfully caught myself and said “can you imagine someone else maybe who had moved here from a very cold and dreary climate who would be so excited to see the sun each morning shining in their eyes like this?” Constantly pulling myself back into gratitude. It takes such practice, it’s truly not a natural way of being. It takes such mindfulness to be present in your moments and be thankful for all that we are given. Just reminding myself about this today because I seem to need an awful lot of reminders. Just keep trying, never give up. Things are happening even when we don’t realize they are happening.
Take a moment if you will and think about what has happened in this one year. Because lots of things can happen in just one year. It could be that not so smooth mountain you are climbing, it could be tragic and sudden loss, it could be new life, it could be healing, it could be endurance, and it could be gaining or losing. It can be so many things. Just think about what has happened in this past year. When you think of the things that have happened remember how you have endured, how you have grown, how you have learned and what blessings have happened amongst the unpredictable. It’s truly amazing this life. It’s something to be grateful for that’s for sure. As I woke this morning, I was thankful to open the shutters to let that bright light in. Light, can you imagine life without it?